Double-edged 真理報雙語版


A bilingual and bicultural Christian young adults blog //////////////// 青年華裔基督徒的博客

Examples of Love


I went from being a happy girl to someone totally different. I went through a time where I decided I wanted to die, and I told God I want to die. The next morning, I woke up, and I was still alive. I thought maybe God wanted me to keep living. I wanted to die because I was tired of this world. I thought that everything was strange. I also did not know how my future would be like.

I was in Hong Kong for my Christmas vacation, and I do not remember doing the New Year countdown, or other things I had done. I thought that was very strange I didn’t remember doing the countdown.

I was worried about not knowing when I would finish school or what I should do as a job. I have no idea what I should do in the future. At that time I’ve thought of two verses: “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” (Philippians 4:8) and Romans 5:3-5 “Not only so… suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts.” After reading Romans, I thought I was suffering.

I had been thinking a lot of things during that time. I kept noticing days and months kept on passing. I was worried things would not change back to normal. I prayed to God that I want things to be back to normal in my life.

One day, I felt like reading The Prayer of Jabez for Kids/Teens and it changed me back to the always smiling person. I was so sad; I told God that I want to feel excited about something and that I wanted some kind of surprise.

On the first page of The Prayer of Jabez, the second sentence says, “Wouldn’t you rather have one [life] that’s filled with adventure, excitement, and lots of fun?” That made me wanted to continue reading the book. The prayer that Jabez prayed is the exact thing I want in my life. Through this suffering of not being happy and confused, I feel that the part where his prayer said “keep me from evil” (1 Chronicles 4:10) is very important to me. I haven’t been the usual happy person for six months; I did not see my friends or did what I used to do.

While I was this different person, I asked God for joy. God heard that I wanted me to be happy again and want to be back to normal. I’m so happy that I’m alive right now; I can do something for God. I believe the last part of Isaiah 59:1 is so true, “nor his ear too dull to hear.” He heard me and answered my prayer. After reading this version and the original version of The Prayer of Jabez, I read that God is in control. I don’t remember where I read this, but I know that God has a plan already made for my future even before I was born. That encouraged me.

I know and believe that God has a perfect plan for my future and a perfect timing. Colossians 3:2 says, “Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.” This verse tells me not to worry about my future, and just focus on God. After rereading these encouraging verses, I found out a lot of verses says not to worry in different ways. These encouraging verses helped me understand more about God. Now I understand more about God after suffering through sadness, loneliness, and confusion. I now know that God hears and that He can help me through my life. I feel that God is with me.

Through this time, there had been many people praying for me, encouraging me and caring about me. There were people I didn’t know very well who cared about me. I felt those were examples of unexpected love. God answered my prayer by giving me surprises. He knows I love surprises. One day, I woke up, and I cried; I was so happy about how much love I have. I asked one sister from church how I could thank God not just by saying thank you, and I was told to worship God.


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"Double-edged"is bilingual blog in affiliation with Truth Monthly, a Chinese Christian monthly print publication based in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada.

This blog features mostly original writings as well as comics, poetry, and other works of art by local Christian young adults.

For more information or to submit your own writing, please email

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